Monthly Archives: May 2007

Velcro is a Mom’s BFF

Ok summer bathing beauties, gather round. With Memorial Day Weekend upon us, let’s talk swimsuit fashion for our little tykes today.

Caveat: The brightest among you might quickly notice that my links are taking you to girls clothing. That’s because I’m a mom of a girl. And frankly, let’s be honest, girl clothes are more fun.

But for those of you with sweet little boys, fret not. We are still linking to some of KT’s fav places for kids clothes, so you can just link yourself over to the boy section, I have great taste and have honed in on the best of the best, so really, you’re still in good hands.

Never doubt moi. So with that. First up, swimsuits:

I am a big fan of mini-Boden clothes. They are adorable, not everyone has them, and well, they hail from Britain. Everything is always cooler when they cross the pond. Here’s a link to a suit that I swooped up for darling daughter way back in March when it first caught my attention – we have it in strawberries and pink, of course:

http://www.bodenusa.com/col.asp?segname=Mini&styid=36024&segid=5&gpname=Swimwear&desname=Girly+Swimsuit&gpid=21&gen=1

JCrew also makes clothes for kids and I’ve noticed that they run really small. Darling daughter could fit into the size 2T back when she was barely 1, and well, at that time she was still just wearing 12-18 month sizes from Baby Gap. So caution – they run small. My biggest beef so far with the Crew Cuts clothes is that they are just mini-reproductions of adult sized clothes. And frankly, I think it’s a little weird to have a 2 year old wearing the same thing a 35 year old would wear, for the most part. So – I’m not loving most of their swim wear for girls but here’s a link anyway, I think it makes my point:

http://www.jcrew.com/catalog/product.jhtml?id=prod88368381&catId=cat180957

Should my 18 month old really be prowling the beach, channeling her inner-sexy leopard?

Here’s where my inner-sleeping Republican rears its ugly head.

No. Quite plainly, is the answer.

Now, moving on. Baby Gap has always been a tried and true favorite. First of all, the quality is good and the price is right, particularly because it goes on sale really quickly. Secondly, the sizing is really well done. You can actually buy an 18-24 month size, for example, and it will fit your 18-24 month old. At least it does mine and always has. Sure I had to buy them a little bigger for a while when she was growing like a weed as a 6 month old, but more often than not, they are sized really well. I think this one is particularly cute:

http://www.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=35362&pid=484217

Now for beach accessories for tykes. Hats are a must-do for all of us, particularly the little ones, every day of the year. We all know that most children rip the hats off their heads faster than you put them on. Oddly, my darling daughter loves an accessory and actually seeks out her hats in our house so she can wear one as much as possible, but she’s the exception. And even with her fierce love of hats, if it doesn’t have a Velcro attachment to keep it on the head, then forget about it.

It’s difficult to find the velcroe attachment but I’ve found Janie and Jack, also one of my fav places to shop, particularly for dress-up clothes, is good about the velcro attachment under the chin. Here’s an example:

http://www.janieandjack.com/shop/dept_item.jsp?PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524443452877&FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374303716283&bmUID=1179840509119&productSizeSelected=0

Note the wide brim which is also very important. If you’ve ever tried to apply sunscreen to a toddler, you know it’s no small feat, so any added help you can get with a wide brim to block the sun from their precious face, the better off you are.

While we’re on the subject of wide brimmed hats, I’m particularly pleased with the Hanna Andersson selection. The only flaw is that you have to tie the string under the chin – no velcro.

Velcro makes a mom’s life easy.

But still the amount of shade this particular hat provides from the sun makes the extra pain of having to tie the strings together, worth the effort:

http://www.hannaandersson.com/Style.asp?from=SC|5|1|156|47|8||&simg=22568_D42&mwc=D42

Now the only thing left is footwear. This is an area where I could really get carried away. I mean, the options are endless and adorable. But again, the inner practical mom in me comes out as I feel myself moving towards the cash register at Nordstrom holding an adorable pair of $60 shoes for my daughter.

I remind myself the following:

a. it is impossible to get a pair of shoes on a toddler to begin with. If your kid isn’t walking yet, then you might still think shoelaces work. If your kid is walking, you know better. I’m here to tell you – shoelaces – forget about it. No matter how cute the shoe.

b. Velcro is again your best friend.

c. So are crocs.

And so, of course you could spot my darling daughter strolling down the beach in these this summer, if you’re on the Delaware shore by any chance:

http://shop.crocs.com/pc-21-4-kids-cayman.aspx?reqid=21&reqProdTypeId=41p&subsectionname=footwear&section=products

I can get them on her feet in a jiffy, they stay on, and they’ll protect her little toes from the burning hot sand better than sandals.

But, speaking of sandals, how adorable are these:

http://www.janieandjack.com/shop/dept_item.jsp?PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524443452874&FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374303093469&bmUID=1179841826749&productSizeSelected=0

And note – no latch that you have to waste time trying to get hooked while your toddler moves a mile a minute.

And so, dear kittens, go forth and enjoy purchasing swimwear for your tyke. The beauty of it is this – they look good in anything. They don’t have to be tortured by glaring at themselves in changing room mirrors with unfriendly lighting. You can just buy it, go home, put them in their little suit, and melt when you see those chubby little legs moving around in their new summer 07 swimsuit.

But don’t forget – velcroe is your best friend.

Stay-At-Home Dad’s

We all know there is constant talk among the media about stay-at-home mom’s and mom’s “opting out” of the workforce and all the barriers they face when trying to “re-enter” the workforce.

I think there was something on this morning on the “Today” show but I wasn’t paying attention.

All this talk and drama has gotten me to thinking, what about Stay-At-Home Dads?

Yes, I realize there are much fewer of them than there are SAHM’s but they’re still out there. And I suspect the number of them is slowly on the rise over the years.

It seems to me that when a couple is evaluating their childcare situation when the wife is pregnant (NOTE: there is no “We” are pregnant on KT. Until “We” are constipated and peeing ever 2 hours all night and gain 40 pounds and carry a life inside of us, there is no “we” in pregnancy here.) – so back to when the wife is pregnant. Each couple evaluates who will take care of the child after maternity leave. Every couple has their own personal list of reasons why they make the decisions they do – and whatever – it seems to me that when the Dad ends up staying home, it has much to do with the same reasons why the Mom does.

The wife is probably making more money and/or happier in her career – is likely the biggest reason.

So what I’m left wondering is – what happens when these Dad’s want to re-enter the workforce?

Let’s presume that these young Dad’s don’t actually plan to be out of work for the next 20 years. Let’s say they figure maybe 2 years tops.

So what happens?

Are they faced with the same kind of “on-ramp” issues that the media so shrilly declares that women face?

How do employers evaluate a job candidate when they see this man has been raising children full-time the past 2 years?

I really want to know. I’ve been curious about this a while. And well, because I do have a full-time job that isn’t KT, I only had limited time to do an online search.

But I did one.

I poked around to see if I could find figures on Dad’s re-entering the workplace and if the hurdles they face are no different than women. And frankly, why should they be?

In fact, I wonder if they have bigger hurdles because it would require a progressive workplace to think it’s valiant and admirable for this man to have let his wife support him and the baby as he stayed home and cleaned poopy diapers and did the laundry all day.  And read Elmo’s Potty Time day-in-day-out while he potty trained the young tyke.

SO really – what’s the deal?

Why did I find very little online about this trend?

Here’s what I did find from a Salary.com survey last year:

“Given that the U.S. Census Bureau estimated only 143,000 dads stayed at home with their children while their spouse worked in 2005, out of 26.4 million married fathers with children living at home, it was difficult to calculate precise statistics on how stay-at-home dads spend their time,” said Cuddeba.

OK – so that data is a little dated. But still – it’s a start.

After a few more key word searches, I found out that Colbert did a funny piece on Dad’s at Home and there is a “At Home Dad” Convention:

http://www.athomedadconvention.com/

But still no commentary or research on dad’s re-entering the workforce after staying home.

What I did find was that it seems more common that these at-home dad’s are keeping a link with the workforce. They might be consulting or freelancing, but they are maybe keeping some kind of link going.

So if that’s the case, then why?

If you have read anything on this – send me the link. I want to know if men are treated differently than women? I want to know if they are given more or less flexibility with employers when they want to stay home.

I want to know more about this because of the 143,000 at-home Dad’s in 2005, surely some of them have gone back to work full-time.

Another Job Application

Dear fans of KT know that I recently applied for a job to be the next Queen of England. Shockingly, my beloved Prince William has yet to respond to my somewhat forward and presumptuous application.

I know. I know. You are all devastated. I would make such a great Queen.

But see, KT doesn’t dwell on things. She moves on. And so today, I am applying for another job. This one isn’t quite as high profile as being Queen, but it will suffice.

It sill would include a makeup and hair stylist. Surely a publicist. And most definitely gobs of loyal fans. Something I could get used too. And fast.

So – you are wondering – KT – what is it?

It is this: Jenny Garner is shopping around a new show, kind of like “The View” but for mom’s.

According to People, Jenny Garner would be the Barbara Walters of the show:

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20038918,00.html

So today, I am writing to you, dear friend Jenny Garner. This is my application to be on your show.

First of all, I’ve considered you my celeb mom kindred spirit. We had our daughters around the same time. And frankly, you seem normal and nice. I like that you are photographed having fun at the park with your daughter.

I go to the park with my daughter too. And I smile and look pretty too. Except there are no paparazzi there trailing me around. But I’d look cute like you too. And my sweet daughter, well, she’s pretty good looking, so she’d look great in the pics too.

But see – you don’t need a twinkie on the show. You need someone different from you. And while some say my body is like yours, we are still different.

See, I am Rosie to your Barbara Walters.

But I’m good looking Rosie.

I can easily offend Republicans.

I thrive off stirring the pot.

I have lots of opinions that I LOVE to share and would love even more to be PAID to share them.

And I’m funny. And if you pick some mousy demure Republican mom to be on the show, I’ll pick on her. Mercilessly. The fans will love it.

Oh, and did I mention I’m also a mom. I’m a real mom. Not that you’re not. But see, we’re different kinds of mom’s because well, we have different kinds of money and accessibility to things.

So while you are off putting together your show, know that you’ve got a perfect co-hostess right here in DC, waiting for your call, to help spruce up your ratings. I can hurl insults at Trump, I can  mock his hair. I will even find a new shtick. Hell, with the Presidential election season quickly coming upon us, there are endless opportunities to insult old white men.

Jenny G – I’m your gal.

I’ll have my people contact your people.

Grandmom’s

I hope you all had a good Mother’s Day Weekend. The highlight of my weekend was taking our daughter to the zoo on Saturday.  We last took her on her first birthday and now she is a week shy of her 18 month birthday. It’s one way to really notice the many ways she’s changed in the past 6 months. While she was delighted by the zoo animals on her first birthday, she was much more excited this time. She was enthralled with the seals as they splashed and played in the water and she worked so hard to say “seal” – she got as close as “SSS” “SSSS.”

It’s amazing how kids learn language and start to put the words together. And which words and letters trip them up.

I still stand by Friday’s posting about how Mother’s Day is for the birds (except the part about the gifts, flowers and cards). Much of yesterday was spent trekking from one location to the next to see every family member and eat more food. Good times.

But one thing really struck me yesterday. It was the Modern Love column in the NYT. Did you read it?

If you didn’t read it, then I insist that you go read it immediately.

http://www.nytimes.com/2007/05/13/fashion/13love.html?_r=1&ref=style&oref=slogin

I was enthralled with this piece. And it really got me to thinking what I would have done in this situation.

SPOILER ALERT – if you haven’t read the piece, then go read it and then come back to the rest of my entry. If you have read it, continue on.

So, after I read it, fought back some tears, and thought about it a while, I then forced it on my mom. I kept interrupting her “where are you in the piece? what’s happening now?”

It felt like it took her an eternity to read.

But I had to know. What would she do in that situation? Because I didn’t know what I would do but I just couldn’t imagine leaving the baby behind. Despite all the problems the baby was going to face, I just wasn’t sure how you could face yourself every day and how you could get through each day without knowing what had happened to the baby. And what might have happened if you’d brought her home.

On the flip side, I wouldn’t have judged the author if she and her husband decided to leave the baby behind. I mean – what a difficult and heart breaking situation.

Finally my mom was done. And I asked her. I  said “what would you have done if it had been you?”

She had a smile on her face and she said, without even thinking twice, “I would have told the adoption agency lady to give me another one. I would have told her that I’d take the sick baby but they misled me, so I’ll take another baby too. Two for the price of one.”

I was floored.

What sheer brilliance. Two babies!

One presumably healthy and one presumably sick.

Not only did her response show just how much my mom loves babies and just how much my mom loves being a mom. It showed me something else.

It showed the beauty of grandparents.

Lord knows I’ve griped about grandparents and opinions and interference on KT plenty. But the thing about grandparents is this – they have the perspective those of us who are just a few years into this – we don’t have yet.

They know that the crying ends, the waking up through the night technically ends, the temper tantrums become few and far between and at the end of the day, children bring more joy than anything. Grandparents know this.

Those of us lost thick in the weeds, trying to figure our way through sleepless nights and crazy toddler tantrums, we can easily forget this.

So of course my mom wanted two.

Meanwhile my mind was all tied up with “What if the sick baby was always sick and what if she died and what if we couldn’t afford all the medical care.” And on and on and on. Like the uptight newbie parent that I am.

We all need a Grandparent around us, like it or not.