I’m great in 2008……

Happy New Year Kittens!

First, let me apologize for my long silence. You know that you are always on my mind but sometimes there are a few hurdles in my way. It seems that with parenthood, I am still learning and re-learning the lesson that the best laid plans are, well, just that. In fact, rarely does something actually play out how you imagine it would.

Example? Well, my darling daughter, husband, parents, nanny and myself were all struck with the horrible Norovirus the week before Christmas (I swear that trip to that hideous Elmo Show with the terrible fight with my husband is the culprit. I swear we picked it up there). If you’ve experienced this drama, well then, you know what kind of hell we endured. I had the best intentions, that week before Christmas. I had so much work to do, I had errands to run during my lunch hour, I had presents to wrap, cookies to make, cards to send, manicure, pedicure and haircut appointments to enjoy, I was a gal with things to do. None of those things included laying on the floor next to the toilet, wishing for death, and thanking God for Elmo who kept my daughter quite distracted while I puked my guts up, hoping someone would come home soon.

So that’s why you didn’t hear from me before Christmas. And I’ve yet to get that manicure, pedicure or haircut.

Then we went to my parent’s house for Christmas and it was fun. Until the night of Christmas Eve. When the Norovirus struck my parent’s house. And tore through me, all three of my sisters and my mom again. You got it. Twice in the span of one week. Fortunately it spared my darling daughter and husband the second time. So, again, that same dreaded lesson reared its ugly head again. I imagined a really fun Christmas day, watching my daughter REALLY enjoy Christmas for the first time, sipping coffee, laughing and joking with my family. I didn’t quite imagine all three bathrooms in the house being occupied with an adult female body laying next to the toilet, wishing for death.

But really, who does imagine that when they think of Christmas?

Probably me next year. I’ll imagine it.

So what’s my point? Well, my first point is that this is largely why you heard nothing from me for so long. My other point is, maybe it’s best not to really internalize the reality that the best laid plans are well, just that, because then you’d walk around being all negative and Debbie Downer for the rest of your life. This is parenthood and life, right? It just sort of happens, whether you like it or not.

Many really sweet things still happened over Christmas. My two-year old was pretty oblivious to the misery and sickness that was happening around her and she still loved Christmas. She graduated from a sweet, innocent request by calling Santa before Christmas and asking him for a “gingerbread house” to calling Santa after Christmas and just saying “Bring presents.”

Now that’s what I’m talking about, a gal who appreciates gifts and knows how to state what she wants.

The other fun thing to discuss is the fact that it’s, well, a new year. I, for one, am opposed to New Years Resolutions. It’s like giving up something for Lent. Haven’t I given up enough already? I mean, what do they say, in the first year of a baby’s life, you lose like a year’s worth of sleep. Need I get into what happens to our bodies from pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding. Isn’t that enough?

So instead, I will resolve the following:

1. I resolve to make sure my husband completes all of his assignments on his “to do” list every weekend.

2. I resolve to make sure I am equally, if not, more, pretty and funny by the end of 2008 as I was at the end of 2007.

3. I resolve to still drive like a maniac at the end of each work day and honk and swear and wave my fist at any annoying slow driver who’s delaying my efforts to get home quickly to play with my darling daughter.

4. I resolve to continue to be as dedicated to fashion and shoes and accessories in 2008 as I was in 2007.

5. I resolve to remain steadfast in my commitment to celebrity gossip and spreading it around as fast as I can.

See, kittens, it’s 2008, we’re great…….what else is there to say?

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