Dads – Especially Dads-to-be

It’s time we cover dads on kitty time. Yes, kitty time prefers to talk about herself on kitty time. Mais oui. But now, it’s time to talk a bit about dads.

A few preggo’s out there inspired me to write about dads today. The reason for my inspiration was that they commented on sending a previous kitty-time posting along to their husbands. I like that. Good thinking preggos.

So this is for you dads out there, really mainly, you dads-to-be.

Let’s first talk about why dads are important. They play with babies differently that mom’s do. They love their babies differently and they talk with them in a different way. Their role is fundamentally important. But they are also more important to their wives than ever before.

In the first week or so after having our baby, I was dependent on my husband in a way I never imagined. Part of it was because I was TERRIFIED to be alone in the house with the baby and really just wanted someone else to be there. But I also just really needed him emotionally. My body was torn apart. I was exhausted from labor. I was exhausted from 9 months of pregnancy. I was emotionally and physically exhausted and I needed my husband around.

Not only did I need him to be there. But I was delighted to watch him become a father. It was like a light switch turned on and overnight he became a doting dad and I loved seeing it. It’s a joy of parenthood that we easily forget to talk about because we are so excited about the baby. But trust me ladies, it’s really amazing seeing this new side of your husband that you never knew was there.

Back to the dads. This is a very important piece of advice for you new dads out there – your job is to love and support your wife. You aren’t tired from the pregnancy. You arent tired from the labor. Sure, you might be tired because you were up all night long, on your feet, supporting her, while she was getting that baby out. But no one cares if you are tired from that. You don’t even know tired yet.

Then the baby comes home and life changes. You, the new dad, might stay home a few days or a few weeks – but whatever it is – NEVER COMPLAIN TO YOUR WIFE ABOUT BEING TIRED.

And most importantly – never engage in the “Who’s more tired” competition. Because guess what – you, dear dad, are not, if you want to roll up the sleeves and get into it. You might have to go off to work all day and come home to an emotional wife who quickly passes this baby off to you and barks at you to deal with it..and then she wonders what’s for dinner….and is raging mad if you are two minutes later than expected…and then the baby is up every few hours all night and then you are off to work.

Sure, you’re tired.

But keep it to yourself. Support your wife, love your baby, love your wife for bringing this miracle into the world, keep on trekking, and your wife will be all the grateful and love you all the more for it. She’ll know you’re tired. But she’ll appreciate your support and she’ll appreciate the fact that you respect her enough to know that it’s not a competition and she is tired too.

So dad’s – you are amazing and so very needed. But keep the tired complaining to your friends….and don’t forget to bring flowers home to your wife on occasion. She’ll definitely need them in those first few weeks.

One Response to Dads – Especially Dads-to-be
  1. CoffeeBreak Revolution
    January 10, 2007 | 3:38 pm

    Or better yet, bring home dinner.

    My favorite is when Brian runs around the corner to surprise Emma. Hilarious!

    -emily

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